Happy Ugly Bird Day

26 11 2009

P. 94  11/26/09

Some people refer to Thanksgiving as T-Day for short, or Turkey Day, to be clever. If I were these people though, I’d think twice about paying homage to the turkey. Like any other non-vegetarian Thanksgiving-goer, I like to eat my share of turkey. But one of the reasons I enjoy it so much is because I give thanks for this bird being dead.

The turkey is definitely one of the ugliest birds out there. So thank goodness it is dead and we are consuming it. I don’t need to see these birds living in the wilderness. They are ugly birds, so it is a good thing we decided to go with this selection to kill and eat on Thanksgiving.

While I’m on the subject of ugly birds, I will tell you that the turkey is not the only nasty-looking bird out there. Oh no, believe me, there are plenty of other disturbing birds out there. I don’t want to completely ruin your appetite today, so I will only provide you with a couple other examples.

Take the pelican. This prehistoric beast has the most intimidating mouth around (that’s what she said). Sure, this bird can seem graceful as it glides near the water looking for fish, but once it opens its mouth, you’ve got another creature you’re dealing with. This freak has an enormous mouth for fishing and you don’t want to get near one. (Check out this highly disturbing website for some truly gross pictures of the pelican’s disturbing beak.)

Last, but surely not least is the owl. For a while now, I have thought the owl is one of the scariest birds out there. Sure, owls have been made to be cute and a “cool, hip” symbol, but I tell you they are scary. Those big eyes staring you down, the curled, snappy beak, and that haunting pose of theirs where they basically just look like they are out to get you. And when they just happen to be ready to scare you they sure put on a display. (And by display, I mean terrifying freak show.) You are being forewarned, that you may want to hide your children and overt your eyes. What you are about to see, may give you nightmares…..

Sorry kids, I had to.

So on this holiday, when you sit down to chow on some turkey, don’t forget you are doing the world a wonderful service by ridding the land of such a foul foul. Nobody should have to look at such awful-looking birds. -Unless they are dead, on a plate, and covered in gravy and cranberry sauce, and stuffing. Then, by all means, forget these pictures and gobble away!

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4 responses

26 11 2009
Allie Allen

Joe and I are laughing! I love this post! We will go kill a turkey right now! But not an owl. I don’t care what you say, I love owls!

27 11 2009
dazey2

Haha! glad you loved the post! Owls can be borderline ok. But not the one pictured.

4 10 2010
Richard

omg that owl is so cute

11 01 2013
http://tinyurl.com/openherny42890

This specific blog post, “Happy Ugly Bird Day C.A.P.S.
Love.” was in fact great. I’m generating out a copy to clearly
show my personal pals. Thanks for the post-Kelli

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